Click... click... click... That's what I hear from the wall clock, staring at the silence of the darkness beyond. You're with me right now but... for how long? I really want to be your friend, I really do but my feelings make it way too hard to do so. Maybe we'll still be the same, better than before or none at all.

You're my friend and I want you to be happy. If it makes you happy for me to stay friends with you long after I have exposed my heart wide open to you, so be it. I'll try but I can't promise you anything.

Now that it's starting to move along, I want to tell you the things I'll miss about you:

• out of this world conversations
• drinking bouts weekly
• making me laugh
• being there for me when I need someone
• your laughter, whether awkward or real
• taking care of me when I needed
• the Mandarin classes that I often ace
  
• people watching while smoking
• passion fruit juice
• sweet, angelic yet goofy smile
• crazy dance moves with the weird-ass songs you sing
• telling you that you're academically apathetic
• holding your hand (three years have past but I still do)
• your company
• your eternal craving for sansrival

But then again, the whole is more than the sum of its parts. I can do without all of those but I can't do without you even though I know it's the best thing for me.